Charlie Hatton About This
About Me
Email Me

Bookmark
 FeedBurnerEmailTwitterFacebookAmazon
Charlie Hatton
Brookline, MA



All Quotes
Site Search:
HomeAboutArchiveBestShopEmail

« Musings From the Porcelain Cathedral (No, Dammit, the Other One!) | Main | If You Didn't Get It On Tape, You Can't Prove Nothin' »

Well, There's a Quarter. Do You Care Yet?

It's my blog. I'll cry if I want to. You would cry too, if I blogged about you.

Today marks my three-month blogging anniversary. One whole quarter's worth of blather, and another milestone to talk about.

(Yes, I'm well aware that I just wrote about finishing my '101 Things Posts About Me', and then my hundredth post, and now I'm already blogging about the blog again. Give me a break. What do you think, I'm made of topics here? Eighty-five posts in two weeks cuts into the old subject pile, you know.)

Anyway, I wrote my first post on June 16th, exactly three months ago. I wasn't quite sure how things would turn out, or whether I'd still be writing now, but I think the first quarter has gone okay. I seem to have found my voice. Never mind that it alternates between the crackly wheeze of a dirty old man and the whiny whinny of a pre-teen girl -- it's my voice, dammit. And now that I've found it, I'm unleashing it on the world. Stand back!

So, to commemorate the occasion, I've updated my 'Best Of' links over on the right. I finally filled the entry list out to twenty, and added another twenty from the '101 Things' posts. Anything to drag the eyeballs to the good stuff, you know. I'm here to help. Help me help you, would you?

In any case, thanks for reading. A couple of you have been here since the beginning, and I really appreciate that. It's just that sort of love that makes the world go 'round. Some say love won't pay the rent, but... well, I've never been a landlord myself, but I've got to believe that a little hootchie-cootchie with the man would at least buy you a few days to get some money together. That's all I'm saying. Now what the hell was I talking about?

Anyway, woo hoo, first quarter!

I've been thinking of doing something to spice the old place up, but I'm not sure what would work well. Really, I should never be trusted to make my own judgements.

(That's why I always order out when it's my night to put dinner on the table. I've had too many culinary experiences go hurl-inducingly wrong. You know the 'two great tastes that taste great together' theory? Well, apparently in the hands of a madman, it can't be trusted. Like a chainsaw, or missle launcher, or a smarmy boy band.

Anyway, I apparently have no clue about food 'pairings'. Pairings. Harrumph. You'd think edibles were sad, lonely teenagers -- why do they need 'pairing', anyway? I say, if you like something, then eat it, and then eat something else you like. What's all the fuss about? Why can't I serve steak and ice cream, for instance, or broccoli in applesauce? Does it really matter if you eat them together, or ten minutes apart? C'mon -- they're all headed down the same chute in the end, right? Gimme a break.

It also seems that I've got a problem with substitutions. I'll give you an example -- a while back, I wanted to surprise my wife with some homemade fudge. Peanut butter fudge, to be specific. Fine. So, I found a recipe, and started mixing, and things were going just swimmingly. Until I discovered that we were out of peanut butter, that is. Bitches!

But I was past the point of no return. There were dirty bowls and measuring cups, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna dirty dishes and get nothing out of it. So, I improvised; I got as close as I possibly could, given the supplies I had to work with at the time. It was a perfectly reasonable decision, I think. Really.

Unfortunately, once I'd mixed the mayonnaise into the chocolate, I realized that it wasn't quite as thick as real peanut butter. Close, but no Jiffy. So, I needed something to thicken the mix. And even in retrospect, I'm not sure that I could have done better than Crisco. I'm really not. It seemed like a good idea at the time, anyway, and the fudge mix actually looked just about right.

(Okay, a little more marshmallowy than I'd ideally like, but that's pretty true of me, too, and I'm not giving up on that. So why would I call it quits on the fudge?)

Now, I'd like to be able to describe the series of faces that my wife made when she tasted the fudge. I'd also like to be able to tell you that I gave her some warning that all in the fudge pan may not have been as it seemed. I'd like to do those things, but good Lord and butter, I just can't. I can't tell you that I told her, because obviously I didn't, or she'd have never dared to try the unholy mess I offered her. She's a smart girl, that one, no matter who she ended up marrying.

And the faces... well, there were just too many, and too twisted and pained, for me to really be able to do them justice. Oh, and there was some rather spectacular projectile vomiting happening in the middle there, somewhere, too. I wouldn't even know how to begin to tell you about that. Suffice to say that I know my wife had pizza and a salad for lunch and dinner that day, but I can't really tell you in which order. Our kitchen wall still smells vaguely of grease and chocolate.)

I get the feeling I was talking about something else. But all that talk of mayo and peanut butter just makes me want a sandwich. Eh.

Oh, I remember. It's how my judgement can't be trusted. Right. So, I'm thinking of doing a little tinkering around here, but I'm not sure where to focus my energies. Here are a few of the things I have in mind to spruce up the old blog:


So, does any of that sound appetizing?

(More so than my extra-special mayo fudge, at least.)

Anything else you'd like to see? Anybody? Bueller? Just lemme know, and I'll give it a shot, no matter how ridiculous. Hey, you've seen what I write. I've got very little pride left.

So, I guess that's about it for this evening. Go check out the links on the right. Maybe you missed something good, who knows? Hell, if you've seen all that crap, go check out one of the blogs listed over there. Those people are saner than I am, and won't take up nearly as much of your time. Except the ones that do, I suppose. A couple of them are just about as talky and random as I am. But they've been at it a lot longer, so at least you won't have to hear about their 'first quarter blogiversaries'. Who'd want to go through this again?





Permalink | Comments (2)






Comments


Happy blog being three months old day! Surely it's a cause for celebration. I might make some mayonnaise fudge in honor of the day. But, yannow, I'm not going to EAT it or anything.


I can't believe peanut butter and Mayo can't be substituted for each other! I mean after all, my mom used to feed us PB and Miracle whip sandwiches...try it...it's DELISH! I only wish I could say I was joking!

Post a comment

HomeAboutArchiveBestShopEmail © 2003-15 Charlie Hatton All Rights Reserved
Highlights
Me on Science:
  Secondhand SCIENCE


Me on ZuG (RIP):
  Zolton's FB Pranks
  Zolton Does Amazon


Me on Baseball:
  Bugs & Cranks


Me on Apartments:
  Author Page


Three Wee Tweets:
Favorite Posts:
30 Facts: Alton Brown
A Commute Dreary
A Hallmark Moment
Blue's Clues Explained
Eight Your 5-Hole?
El Classo de Espanol
Good News for Goofballs
Grammar, Charlie-Style
Grammar, Revisitated
How I Feel About Hippos
How I Feel About Pinatas
How I Feel About Pirates
Life Is Like...
Life Is Also Like...
Smartass 101
Twelve Simple Rules
Unreal Reality Shows
V-Day for Dummies
Wheel of Misfortune
Zolton, Interview Demon

Me, Elsewhere

Features
Standup Comedy Clips

Selected Clips:
  09/10/05: Com. Studio
  04/30/05: Goodfellaz
  04/09/05: Com. Studio
  01/28/05: Com. Studio
  12/11/04: Emerald Isle
  09/06/04: Connection

Boston Comedy Clubs

 My 100 Things Posts

Selected Things:
  #6: My Stitches
  #7: My Name
  #11: My Spelling Bee
  #35: My Spring Break
  #36: My Skydives
  #53: My Memory
  #55: My Quote
  #78: My Pencil
  #91: My Family
  #100: My Poor Knee

More Features:

List of Lists
33 Faces of Me
Cliche-O-Matic
Punchline Fever
Simpsons Quotes
Quantum Terminology

Favorites
Banterist
...Bleeding Obvious
By Ken Levine
Defective Yeti
DeJENNerate
Divorced Dad of Two
Gallivanting Monkey
Junk Drawer
Life... Weirder
Little. Red. Boat.
Mighty Geek
Mitchieville
PCPPP
Scaryduck
Scott's Tip of the Day
Something Authorly
TGNP
Unlikely Explanations

Archives
Full Archive

Category Archives:

(Stupid) Computers (70)
A Doofus Is Me (203)
Articles 'n' Zines (74)
Audience Participation (35)
Awkward Conversations (176)
Bits About Blogging (168)
Bitter Old Man Rants (50)
Blasts from My Past (78)
Cars 'n' Drivers (60)
Dog Drivel (78)
Eek!Cards (267)
Foodstuff Fluff (116)
Fun with Words! (71)
Googlicious! (27)
Grooming Gaffes (88)
Just Life (238)
Loopy Lists (33)
Making Fun of Jerks (59)
Marketing Weenies (66)
Married and a Moron (185)
Miscellaneous Nonsense (62)
Potty Talk / Yes, I'm a Pig (84)
Sleep, and Lack Thereof (34)
TV & Movies & Games, O My! (101)
Tales from the Stage (74)
Tasty Beverages (29)
The Happy Homeowner (81)
Vacations 'n' Holidays (134)
Weird for the Sake of Weird (71)
Whither the Weather (40)
Wicked Pissah Bahstan (49)
Wide World o' Sports (124)
Work, Work, Work (206)

Heroes
Alas Smith and Jones
Berkeley Breathed
Bill Hicks
Dave Barry
Dexter's Laboratory
Douglas Adams
Evening at the Improv
Fawlty Towers
George Alec Effinger
Grover
Jake Johannsen
Married... With Children
Monty Python
Nick Bakay
Peter King
Ren and Stimpy
Rob Neyer
Sluggy Freelance
The Simpsons
The State

Plugs, Shameless
Alltop, confirmation that I kick ass

TopOfBlogs

HumorSource

Blogging Fusion Blog Directory

bloglovin

Listed on BlogShares

Top Blogs

 

Feeds and More
Subscribe via FeedBurner

[Subscribe]

RDF
RSS 2.0
Atom
Credits
Site Hosting:
Solid Solutions

Powered by:
MovableType

Title Banner Photo:
Shirley Harshenin

Creative Commons License
  This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons License

Mint Installation

Performancing Metrics

Page copy protected against web site content infringement by Copyscape

Valid XHTML 1.0

Valid CSS!

© 2003-15 Charlie Hatton
All Rights Reserved